This is Detective Ned, digging deep for clues in pots.
You meet all kinds in this line of work. Suspects, witnesses, tourists, liars, ex-spouses, and a surprisingly large number of eccentrics.
But for today thereās one guy who stands out.
Letās call him Fern Guy.
He never shows his face. Never. Every time I tried to interview him, he used a potted plant as a shield. He held it in front of his face, acting like he was hiding from photographers. Like the paparazzi were “planted” in front of his house waiting. Maybe he was hiding. Maybe he’s the killer. Why don’t you find out? Read Pairs. Guess what? It’s not just in one place anymore! Check it out here.
Anyway, maybe you think it’s him. Maybe it’s not. You decide.
From what I hear, sometimes he holds a ficus. Only once was it a cactus. They are always leafy. Always suspicious. You get the picture about potted clues?
š Why the Shrubbery?
Now I donāt know what he thought he was doing. Camouflage? Emotional support photosynthesis? Or maybe just allergic to eye contact. But I do know this: someone was lying about the night of the murder. Fern Guy might have known more than he let on. Or maybe more than his potted plant clued us in on.
At one point I said, āSir, Iām going to need you to put the plant down.ā
He responded with silence. And a tighter grip.
Honestly, it was unnerving.
š¬ Enter: Science
When regular questioning fails, I let Bob the Crime Scene Tech take over. Bob doesnāt care about your cactus. Bob cares about your trace elements.
Which brings us to Neutron Activation Analysis (NAA) Fancy name. Fancy results. We can find the chemical fingerprint of tiny traces of material by bombarding the sample with neutrons. These traces include dirt on a shoe, or maybe from a potted plant. Or particles on a jacket. We then analyze the gamma rays that shoot back. Cool, eh? Or hot. That’s up to you.
NAA can tell us what a material is made of, down to its atomic essence. Helpful. Extremely. Sometimes. Bob likes it. For example, someone might say, āIāve never been to the botanical gardens.ā However, Bob analyzes, looks, notices their hoodie is full of rare fertilizer.
Yes, Fern Guy. I’m looking at you.
šŖ“ Still Not Planted. But Maybe Potted.
Did NAA crack the case? Letās just say it gave us a pretty leafy lead. But the face behind the ficus? Still fuzzy. Still ducking behind the greenery at every opportunity.
Maybe heās shy. Maybe heās a cold-blooded killer with a green thumb. Or maybe both. Iāve learned not to rule anything out.
The mystery deepens. The plant flourishes.
Until next time,
āNed
š Crime Scene Tech Tip:
If investigators find unusual soil on a suspectās shoe, NAA can identify its unique elemental signature. It can link the soil to a specific crime scene. This process proves the suspect was exactly where they claimed they werenāt.
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